An Ode to Cinderella – Panto 2011


Our pantomime is over,

the 39th we’ve done!

“Cinderella” was the title,

and didn’t we have fun!

(Oh, no we didn’t…)

Our audiences love it,

when things don’t go quite right,

Let’s focus on the errors,

that happened every night.

Ad-libs there were a-plenty

from those women dressed as twins,

“What sort of man do you think I am?”

kept Buttons on his pins.

Did you know he’s won a prize?

The most exciting of things!

It’s sponsored by the firm Red Bull

It really gave him wings!

On Friday night alone…

We have to give a clap

Fourteen times his arms went up and down

- was he in a flap?

The costumes were amazing

many compliments came forth

I’ll bet you didn’t realise

that they can sew up North!

Transported altogether

they all arrived en masse

June, in charge of costumes,

made comments – some quite crass!

The Sisters had been measured,

their sizes catered in

But compared to other dames

they were obviously thin!

The wigs set off the style

and history of the show

We even met a super-star,

called Amy, did you know?


Newcomers need a mention

let’s face it, even praise

Karen showed her ‘perfectness’

in all sorts of different ways…

To the point of obsession

I would cheer if she was late

Or her words were not quite perfect

she’s on my list of ‘hate’!

Gordon with his accent

played his dame with effeminate ways

He would act through position and gesture,

fix the audience with a gaze!

There was a line that he would say

the chorus were all in throes

In the back room they would all join in

“Yes, they’re called your toes!”


Sally has been on stage before I’m told

I must have been in a fog!

Disguised a little unwittingly

as the ‘World’s Tallest Dog’!?

But this year she was the Prince,

so regal and refined!

(Did you know that without her specs,

she’s practically blind!)


It’s time to make a mention

of the stalwart back stage crew

Each and every one of them

deserves a big “Yahoo!”

Because without their time and help,

little else would work its part,

So whatever role you played this year,

we thank you from our heart.

The props, the drops, the light and sound,

the door or selling tea,

The band, the dressers, make-up, wigs

really where would we be?

That ticket girl was pretty cool,

with dedicated might

Her box office phone a-ringing,

through the day into the night.


The chorus this year (of only 8)

sang out loud and strong

Only one thing held them back,

only one thing really went wrong…

They worked as a team together

to check that all were there…

Then you’d hear “Where’s Bill?”

ringing through the air.


Medusa – our darling Baroness –

left some things quite late,

In rehearsals, I was convinced

she’d be in a state!

When she made an exit –

I swore she didn’t know,

That really where she was headed

was where she was supposed to go!


One more person needs a mention

who stepped in to the light…

She covered for me (Twinkles)

during the day and once at night.

What a super Fairy

she learnt her lines in just one day

I really thank you very much

I don’t know what to say!

You helped me out – in times of need

I just can’t say enough!

But you deserve the headdress

as a memento (including fluff!?)


Sue and Chrissy know their stuff you know

they know just what they do!

They know the expectations,

they micro-manage this old crew!

They work so hard in the background,

they sit at the back of the hall…

So maybe it’s time to take our advice and

“Go and have a Ball!”